Academic Elitism

I'm really sick of academic elitism. I feel like it happens far more often in English than it does in my other major - Social Justice. Perhaps that's because of the nature of social justice, or perhaps that's because English is fighting to be considered a legitimate profession, but I'm really quite sick of this.

Last week, I was asked to be a tutor for the English 3010 Literary Criticism class. Actually, I was suggested specifically by one of the most notoriously difficult professors on campus. I felt kind of good about my performance in the academic sphere.

Today I got back my first paper for Literary Theory, and the grade was a c/c+. What? Am I just sucking it up this year? I feel really horrible about that grade. I've never got a c on anything before. In my entire academic career. I will be able to redo the paper, thankfully, but still. Gah. That's a horrible place to start.

I'm also wondering if I'm really as academically minded as I had initially thought myself to be. Am really not sure about that. I'm feeling the need to go out and live life for a while - so much of what I'm doing right now is entirely theoretical. I don't know how to handle that.

I'll go work on my novel and shut up about this. I both love and hate academic elitism. I know that if I were a professor, I would be an absolute bitch about grading. Exceedingly high expectations. So I guess I have those expectations of myself.

I'll get over it, I promise. Or maybe I won't, considering this is only my sophomore year of school. Maybe this will be a recurring theme as long as I'm working in the English field.

*sigh*

Writing will make me feel better.