Thundercats are GO!

I think I've done everything I need to before the conference. I've packed (though I'm sure I'm forgetting about something majorly important), I've done homework, I've figured out my finances (I have just enough within my comfort zone), and ... I have a sleeping bag. I put in my time card at work, and will (hopefully) be getting paid Saturday.

Things are looking awesome.

Marcella (the professor I've been doing research with) suggested something that kind of rocked my little Arthurian world the other day. She talked about incorporating Summer of Solutions into a project on environmental activism vs. class/labor union activism and building a green economy.

Now is the time to do that kind of thing. The economy fucking sucks, and most people are admitting we should at least attempt to do something about climate change.

Problem? The collaborative research proposal deadline is March 20th. I don't know if I can switch focus that soon.

Other problem? My doing collaborative research on Arthur this summer might help me get into the Arthur senior sem next fall (even though I'd be a junior), which would make my life much easier senior year (as I'll be studying abroad that fall).

So it's looking more like the Arthur project is feasible. The other one would be really intense, and I think I'd need to get my feet wet to really do a good job. One really cool thing about that second idea I've been kicking around is the possibility of making it a sort of (almost) ecological/anthropological study. This is good especially if I decide to go to grad school for Anthropology.

I've also been nerding out hardcore about art lately. This is a really great artist, and I think that if I ever get a big back piece, I would want it to be in this style. Not the super creepy stuff, but ... that stylistic working.

Powershift is tomorrow! Ahh! So exciting! I've never been to something like this before, so I don't know quite how rockin' awesome it's going to be yet. But it should be pretty sweet. I don't know whether I'm insane for looking forward to a collective of 44 hours on a bus this weekend or not, but it's pretty exciting. Great people do awesome thing in confined spaces for prolonged amounts of time.

I should get to bed. Big day/weekend ahead of me.

Thundercats are GO!

Three days til blast-off ...

Three days and counting. DC, here I come!

In case you're curious about this hella awesome conference, I'll post a link here. I'm super, super excited.

http://www.powershift09.org

There. Check it, this is going to be awesome.

Is it strange that I'm super excited about the 20 hour bus ride there, and then the ride back? It'll be really great to chill with new friends. They're all very cool people, and I'm quite happy to be spending any amount of time with them.

As for life as it currently stands, I am absolutely insane this week. I'm trying to finish homework so I can read fun things and socialize on the bus, but that's rather a lot of homework. I should also really do the dishes before I leave (they're getting scary and multiplying ...), as well as the laundry, but I've only really got two more days.

Dad's coming up on Wednesday to pick out a new sleeping bag. He's bothered about the state of my old one. Apparently this means I'm getting a new one. Hey, no complaints here. It's also the week before tech. week at work, and so I should really be at work as much as possible. Not to mention I could really use the money ...

Good news: I submitted a draft of my research proposal to Marcella today. Yay! Hopefully she'll like it. We're meeting up tomorrow to discuss it. I love her to pieces.

It also looks like I might be able to do Summer of Solutions as well as Collaborative Research. That would be cool ... I need to do at least five hours of research a day this summer, but that leaves quite a lot of time for Summer of Solutions. Especially if I'm not a leader-type person.

Meh. As for now, I really need to go to bed, seeing as how I'm still a bit screwed up from my massive sleep schedule reversal.

Good night, lj/blog-land!

I have officially done strange things to my sleep schedule

I didn't go to Tapestry last night to dance. I was too exhausted, and was holding back the PMS crabby and SICK of PEOPLE EVERYWHERE.

All in all I think that was a good decision.

Then, I came back and tried to take a nap. That didn't really work out so well. I got up, stared at my computer for half an hour, and then went to bed. At seven thirty.

And now it's four am and I'm awake, because that was a solid eight hours that I got. It felt absolutely delicious, and waking up this early feels absolutely delicious. You know why? No one, in their right minds, is awake right now. It's really quiet. And that's exciting, because I live in a dorm. People are very rarely quiet here, especially the boys who live in the quad near me. (They've been having a particlularly stupid week, and have been yelling a lot.)

Mmmmm ... silence. I didn't realize how much I missed it.

Now I'm debating what to do in this wonderful silence. I think I'll read. Yes, reading sounds like a good plan. Either Vonnegut or The Mists of Avalon. But first, I'm going to wash out a bowl, make myself some breakfast, and drink some tea. Oh, it has been far too long since I was up at this hour (of my own free will, that is.)

It's really beautiful, imagining myself the only person awake on this floor. There might be someone up late studying, but I doubt it. It's the beginning of semester.

So ... tea and books!

Repercussions of the Lifestyle

It's snowing/sleeting weirdly here. I can't quite tell what the weather is doing. Walking home from work was really super gross.

I've been laaaaaaaazy this week.

I suppose it's just a repercussion of my lifestyle. I'm so busy, all the time. All, all, all the time. And now that most of my major projects are done, almost all motivation has stopped. I really like sleeping, but I also like to stay up late and shit around. Usually, staying up late to shit around wins out, because ... I'm very, very good at distracting myself.

A part of this new trend is that I'm planning my next tattoo. There will be pictures of ideas up at the blog. The next one will probably be pretty small, a text tattoo. I have ideas for a full-back piece, but that's a huge commitment, and ... they are forever after all. I'm also wondering if I want to do something that I've written, or something that someone else has written. As a writer, it would be really cool to have my own words on my body (and potentially more creative). But it might also be weirdly narcissistic. But would it also be strange to have someone else's words on me?

It's a dilemma. I'm obviously not going to get another tattoo for a very long time, but I'm still designing it and will sit on the idea for a long time. Probably until after I graduate. A lot can change in the next couple of years.

I wrote a poem for Creative Writing, and I really like it. That makes me happy - I'm becoming more interested in poetry than I've ever been. Maybe it's because it's easier to write poetry in college than it is to finish any sort of narrative. It's a one-shot, sit down and get a full draft right away. I can also experiment more.

Don't get me wrong, I still love the novel, but it's on a strange sort of hiatus until I can get time to really work on it.

I've caved, and decided to buy an iPod. I miss having portable music ... and iPods have so many awesome things that attach to them. And they're shiny, and ... MISS portable music devices! Especially now that I'm busing a lot of places around the cities. iPods are nice for that. On a side note: I've been pirating music from Hannah, and she has the Dr. Horrible soundtrack. Ooooh, the wonder that is Joss Whedon! I still really need to finish Firefly. Kira: Firefly soon, yes?

It's been a technology/music sort of week.

Pictures of new boots are coming, as well as the new shirt I'm wearing. Potentially a dress too (it's a sexy little casual thing). Actually, picture post in general coming later.

Tonight's docket looks like reading the play for acting tomorrow, and then reading some Vonnegut. I bought "Slaughter-House Five" and "Breakfast of Champions" last weekend, and am dying to get started on them. I've been in a Vonnegut mood for a while now.

X-posted from Livejournal

Last week was potentially one of the best weeks ever.

Here's a list of all that went right:

1. Vagina Monologues was pretty damn successful. We kicked it off on Wednesday, and I didn't have to do too much except for the Hamline performance. The last performance was today, so the campaign is officially over.

2. The Hamline performance was well attended, and we made over $1,000 at the door. Yeah. We're awesome like that.

3. Nancy Pelosi was confirmed as a speaker at Power Shift (which is in 11 days, so stoked!).

4. Got to spend the afternoon kicking around Uptown with mom. I bought a dress, a sweater, and sexy-as-hell boots. All practically brand new, and under $50. Yessss.

5. We applied for and got all the money for our conference funding for Power Shift.

6. At Lindy lessons at Tapestry on Thursday, I was singled out as a good dancer and given a coupon for a discounted hour-long private lesson. Hell to the fuck yes.

7. Ike finally came to swing dancing tonight. This has been a year and a half in the making.

8. I am finally getting a chance to relax.

9. I spent Saturday night with Hannah G. nerding out and talking. We haven't hung out outside of work for far too long. We also did a massive music swap.

And so my life is looking pretty damn awesome right now. I'm incredibly happy, and things are looking up. And after Power Shift, I don't have anything too major planned. February was/is my month of crazy.

Today has been really chill. I had massive amounts of laundry to do, and I did it. I basically just camped out in the lounge on first floor all afternoon, did homework, and kept an eye on my laundry. I probably did about 6 loads.

I think I'm steadily becoming more of a night person. Last night, I stayed up until about midnight, and tonight I think is going to be another long night. I have 60 more pages of reading to do for my history class and a poem to write. I write all my best poetry late at night, so here's hoping that lack of sleep will propel me to write something awesome.

Mmmmmm. Garbage makes really great, grungy pop. I've been listening to Incubus for most of the night, and Shirley Manson's voice is a nice break, along with the super industrial music itself.

I should stop procrastinating and get on that homework. Yes. Ready .... go.

Off to a running start

This semester is, as predicted, off to a running start. My classes appear to be challenging and fun, all at once, which is what I really like.

My classes are:

Acting 1 (I get to play around for two hours on Mondays and Wednesdays. YES.)
Creative Writing (More about this prof. later)
American Lit to 1860 (the professor for this class seemed really cool, and then he would start yelling a lot. In an angry sort of way. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about him, so we'll see how this goes.)
1968: Protest and Revolt in Global Perspective (the professor is hilarious, and the work load is intense. Good combo, they sustain each other)

So my creative writing professor is crazy. You know that stereotypical English professor? The one that is absolutely crazy? I think it might have come from her. We had a "sensory picnic" the first day of class. This means that she laid out blankets, put objects on them, and we were to have a moment of Zen with the objects, and then free write for 10 minutes. (She actually used the word Zen moment.) On February 12 we have the day off. On the syllabus it reads: "Feb. 12 No class. WANDER AND WRITE POEMS."

She makes me smile rather a lot. I love crazy creative writing professors.

Balancing "The Vagina Monologues" and Power Shift has got to be more difficult than expected, but I only have a week left until Vagina Monologues is out of my control. Less than that, even. I am absolutely exhausted, but in a good sort of way. We're getting a lot done for both. It looks like we will have raised $15,000 by the week after next week. (By "we" I mean students from the schools all around the Twin Cities.) That's pretty damn amazing. That conference is going to rock so hard core, I don't even know.

As for the moment, I'm doing some homework and waiting for friends to come over to watch Planet Earth. It should be super sweet. Lovely, lovely lazy Friday.

Days off make me happy.

In order to not burn out on activist things before the full semester even starts, I decided to take my long weekend between J-Term and Spring Semester off. Thus far, it's been four days of wonderful irresponsibility.

Friday, I had planned to stay in and clean my room, and then my dad called and offered to take a friend and me out for lunch. He had to get me my prescription, and it worked just as well, because I needed groceries. It was a really great time, and I love seeing my dad.

That night, I decided to try to clean my room, and then got a call from another friend. Her friends from Iowa were in town, and she was having a shindig at her apartment. So I went, made some cool new friends, and went home and went to bed.

Saturday was pretty lazy. I had hoped to meet up with the same friends for lunch/coffee, and then didn't get to. I ended up going to a ceili at Tapestry, which was fantastic. I haven't done ceili in about a year, and by the time I finished my calves were positively burning. They've been sore for the past two days, but it was worth it. A very delicious sort of sore that makes me want to stay in and be the relaxed homebody I should be on breaks.

Last night, I went swing dancing after spending a remarkably pleasant time at Ike's Superbowl party. I knitted most of the time and talked over the game. Swing dancing was good, but my calves hurt. This morning I could barely walk as a consequence. Am feeling much better now.

I convinced my friends Tim and Kira to go to Tapestry to learn to swing dance on Thursday! It should be a really great time, and seven bucks for a whole night of dancing plus at least two hours of lessons? Really good. Really damn good, in fact.

Dancing is sometimes my life.

Today I read, shot out some emails for Vag. Monos, but was generally very lazy. I did manage to do a weeks' worth of dishes, however. That was fantastic.

I've also been writing again, which feels really good. I took a break to gather my thoughts, and now they're gathered and going very cool places. I'm on chapter 14 of my novel, which is an absolutely fantastic feeling. And I've still got most of tonight to continue writing, I just thought I'd take a quick break to update everyone on my weekend pursuits.

I like breaks. I should take them more often.

My life has been a revolution lately.

This year, I've been feeling great. About the work that I'm doing, about my life. I've been really energized and excited to work on things, and it has been absolutely beautiful.

It started out with just thinking about SPROG. Remembering the fantastic feeling of working with so many wonderful people, and the inspiration I walked away with. I re-connected with Lance and Juliana, and I signed up for both Power Shift and I applied to be a SPROG trainer next summer. I've also been working heavily with Vagina Monologues, which has been great. So far, I've got at least two organizations that look like they may want to co-sponsor the event, which is great. We need all the money we can get.

I've also been working with SPROUT, a group on campus that's trying to get a campus garden and do food justice stuff with it/personal sustainability. The energy there is so fantastic, and I look forward to those meetings every week. It's absolutely beautiful, and I have come to really love the people in that group.

As the energy has been building, I've felt a distinct disconnect with my academics. Maybe it's because I'm doing all of this on top of only one class, and that's Shakespeare, and I feel like we could be going much more in-depth with it. I'm not sure. But there has been a very real feeling that this point in my life is just that: a centrifical point, a place of change, and shifting.

Then I discovered how awesome Green Corps is. It's a year of activist training in the environmental movement/working for different groups around the country on their campaigns. I'd be paid $23,000-something, and I'd be able to get right into some sort of green movement or group.

All of this has been leading up to my own personal revolution.

I don't want to work against violence generally. I don't want to work at a battered women's shelter, or a rape crisis center, or even at a feminist organization. Maybe I could work at a feminist organization, but what I'm really excited about is the environment. What I'm really feeling jazzed about doing is working against climate change, working for sustainable lifestyles, and indigenous rights and natural philosophy. It's a bigger goal, but a supportive one. This is such a huge time for humanity; we have to come to terms with how we're connected to and using the earth. This lifestyle cannot continue.

Of course, this means so many things. It means that my study abroad is now completely changed (I had been doing a study abroad program that had to do with violence, and now that won't really work anymore), and so it's been a mind-reeling day of trying to figure out if I can change my social justice concentration to something like "Environmental Justice and Indigenous Rights."

The killer? It looks like it will be possible.

I haven't figured out study abroad stuff yet, but as of right now, it's looking like I would go to the rainforest in either Brazil or Australia to study natural and human ecology. The one in the Amazon looks more up my alley - it's more focussed on the social issues of poverty that surround the rainforest - and I'm pretty sure that's where I'll go. But Australia would be really, really cool.

It's a huge switch. But trust me, it makes sense. The only thing is that I have to wait until the fall semester of my senior year. I don't want to go to a rainforest during the rainy season. That would be stupid, and make traveling exceedingly difficult.

Honestly, if I were to start college over, I would probably do Environmental Studies as a major (with Anthropology as a "concentration") and get a Religion minor. So far, 2009 has also been a year of spiritual questing. I feel much more at peace, and also like I'm on the right path.

These changes are big, but they're good. My life has shifted - I want to do what will make me happy, and I know that this will make me more happy. I want to embrace this person that I'm becoming, and this is the best way I can do that.

I hope I can sleep now. I'm very tired, but haven't been able to sleep well this week. I would love to just crawl into bed, and not worry about it.

End of Semester and Neil Gaiman

It's been a while since I was on break, and I have failed to post here as of yet. I promise to get better at that.

I finished a paper that, hopefully, is the prelude to a summer collaborative research project. I'm really nervous about how it turned out, as I had to send it to a professor I've never had for class.

Icky. I'll hear back from professors about it soon.

In other news, I've been watching a lot of movies and reading a lot of books. Well, just the one book, as I've only been on break for a semi-limited amount of time. I'm reading Neil Gaiman's "Fragile Things," finally, as it's been out for quite a long time and I somehow just haven't read it. I'm really enjoying it. Really, really enjoying it. I'm beginning to think he's much better at short works than at novels. He's also got a new book of short stories out, and it looks really good.

I've been watching a lot of Jane Austen-y movies. I've only read "Pride and Prejudice," but have seen adaptations of "Emma," "Sense and Sensibility," and "Mansfield Park." I don't remember l liking "Mansfield Park" as much as I did when I watched it a second time. Interesting. I've heard it's not an accurate adaptation (the one that I have is the 1999 version if you imdb it).

This break I've also been getting a hankering to decorate. Everything. Mostly the apartment that I'll be sharing with friends for next year. I keep attempting to remind myself that they will, ultimately, have input on what goes on the walls/in the apartment as well, but I'm just really excited to decorate. I love vintage, and I love tacky/cute/sweet home decorating. Retro junk was on the top of my Christmas list this year. With stars. And stores that I've approved.

Yes, I am a nerd. And far too excited about this.

But it brings me joy, so I'll pursue it. The apartment is going to be sooooo rad.

Reading over Thanksgiving Break

I hope everyone has had a wonderful Thanksgiving, and if you're not from America, I hope you've had a fantastic weekend.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. There's no pressure to buy gifts, no pressure to be religious, it's just about eating and being with friends and family. My parents always have a massive Thanksgiving feast. They got married the day after Thanksgiving, so it's a very special time for them. This year, we had fourteen people over. It was fabulous.

As there are only two weeks of the semester left, I've been frantically working on homework. Managed to write ten pages in a paper yesterday and finish the research for a different paper. Today, I'm hoping to finish up both papers (one is significantly shorter than the other).

Last night, as a treat to myself, I read The Little Prince. Oh my god. I can't believe I've never read it before. It was absolutley beautiful, and caused a bit of a shift in my thinking. This semester has been particularly difficult emotionally, and I've been so stressed out for so long and trying to just stay on top of everything that I've been burned out for weeks. Just ... sad. But this book got me thinking.

I've been trying to reclaim happiness in my life. I've also been trying to figure out what to do with myself, what direction to take my Social Justice major, and life after college. I've realized lately that maybe, emotionally, I'm just not right for working people through conflict. Which had sort of been the original plan. I've been thinking, lately, that maybe I should look at arts for social change instead of women in conflict. I'm much better at that, and it's much more easy for me to sustain and still be happy.

Reading The Little Prince really makes me think that I should do something that allows me to be happy, to cultivate wisdom. I don't always want to have to be in therapy to deal with my job. I want to be happy, I want to have the energy to be creative. I don't think the path that I was going down was going to make me happy. I could already tell - it's been wearing on me.

In this beautiful little book, I feel like I've found permission to do what works for me. I can't really explain it, and I need to read the book several more times to get the full meaning of it, but I read it at a time when it was needed.

I read my mom's copy of it, and I told her how much I loved it. She gave it to me. That's the spirit of the book, right there. Generosity and love.

And everyone could use a little more of that in their lives.

Naps and academics

I need a nap.

I've been trying to work on my abstract for my Arthur paper all day, and I is tired.

So procrastination begins!

I'm really excited to be able to read a novel for fun over break. Yes, I am definitely very excited about that. I also really want to continue writing my novel, which has been on hold for several months and is bothering me. I'm debating what to read. I know that I'll need to finish "The Phantom Tollbooth," but that's a kid's book so it's a really fast read.

I think it's high time I read "The Little Prince." I'm really into literary tattoos, and there are a lot of people that get images from that book as tattoos. I'd like to see what all the fuss is about. I also really want to read some more George Orwell. I'm feeling a reread of "1984," because for some reason "Animal Farm" just isn't catching my eye. But I should read "Animal Farm" at some point. Or some Kurt Vonnegut. I still haven't read any Kurt Vonnegut. I also want to read some Virginia Woolf, when I've got time to just relax and read it. She's got so much going on, I'd like to be able to pull it apart.

... Somehow, I don't think my winter break will be long enough for me to get through all of those books. Sad!

Oh, if only I were done with the semester. I feel like I'm about to go crazy. Yesterday was too nice, being at home. Way, way too nice. I can also focus so much better there than I can here - I think it's because here, it's my life and therefore overwhelming, but at home I have more ability to relax. I just need this semester to be over so I can get a new, fresh start. I hate it when the classes I'm taking get old and stale. Not good.

This post was written a couple of days ago, and I realized it would be really good to put it here. In other news, I'm being picked up by my parents in less than an hour for Thanksgiving. It should be pretty fantastic - Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.

Peace out, folks!

NaNo Rejuvenation

I've been lagging behind in NaNo. This is understandable, considering it's the middle of the semester and November began with a history-making election.

(Hell yes Obama won! I feel like it's ok to hope again.)

And so my mind has been on other things. Clearly. I've been working hard with MPIRG to get out the vote, I've been keeping up with schoolwork (I have As in all of my classes), and I switched novel ideas just before November started. I've literally been starting from scratch, with three characters and a semblance of plot.

As of right now, the word count is at 1718. Considering how busy I've been, that's miraculous.

But it's not nearly where I should be to sit pretty.

Then I opened my email this morning and read Jonathan Stroud's pep talk. And I remembered why I'm doing NaNo. Because writing a novel will always be painful in some way - there isn't time to make it perfect, like you would with a poem. It's a HUGE quantity of writing, and the real writing is in the editing. The novel that I've been working on since this summer (the one I'm not doing for NaNo), was starting to make me question my ability because it isn't perfect or good, and so I took a break from it to do NaNo. And after NaNo, I can return to it with a new vigor, knowing that the first draft is the real trick.

So I'm writing a novel in a month.

I need to write my way up to 6666 words today to catch up, and I will. Even if I don't get that much sleep tonight. It's worth it.

And hopefully soon I'll have a werewolf play-list for noveling! That will be quite exciting.

First post of NaNoWriMo!

So I'm really behind with NaNo. As in, I have a little over one day's worth of writing in.

I knew it would be crazy around election-time (the show I've been working on also opened this weekend, not to mention Halloween festivities). And therefore, I'm really not where I should be with it right now. But ... schoolwork and sanity does have to come first. I think. At some point I'll probably revoke my sanity to push the story really hard core.

I reworked the story two days before November, deciding not to go with my original idea, so now I've got to figure out what the hell I'm doing. Thus far, I really like the storyline. The characters are coming surprisingly fast. I'm excited to get through the prologue and get to the first chapter, in which I introduce my main character.

I need to get designated writing time/writing special things. That will help me. And perhaps a playlist. (Which I will post, if that ever happens.)

My tattoo is amazing. I'm in love with it, and continue to get distracted by it every time I look at my feet.

Tomorrow's going to be crazy. I'm trying really hard not to be nervous about the election. Really, really hard.

"Fun Home"

I just read one of the best books for class. It's called "Fun Home" by Alison Bechdell.

It's actually not really a book. In fact, it is the best graphic novel I've ever read. I normally associate graphic novels with my brief but expensive anime phase, and give little shudder every time I think of them. But this one has reversed my opinion of graphic novels! Absolutely beautiful, and tragic, and comedic all at once, it's now one of my favorite books.

The plot follows Alison's childhood, and her relationship with her father. She's a lesbian, and he was a very closeted gay man. Or ... not quite straight man. Something like that. At any rate, it was fantastic. There are a lot of perfection issues in the family, and a lot of interesting crossings between art and life. What really struck me and kept me entirely enraptured was her constant literary allusion. Somehow, she made it seem absolutely natural, and not at all construed or pretentious.

Perhaps that's because I really like to think in literary allusion. Unfortunately, I'm not well-read enough to pull that off in my real life.

One can dream.

Anyway, I would suggest reading it. It's absolutely wonderful, and not as depressing as it really could have been. Thank you, Professor Reynolds for restoring my faith in the graphic novel as a medium.

I must be crazy.

I'm doing NaNoWriMo this year, but I'm in college and incredibly busy. And November will be me preparing for finals. I don't know if I can put aside time every day to write, and I definitely can't have a crash-writing frenzy at the end - I'll be even more busy; that's the nature of the semester.

I might pull myself out of it. Or I might do it to just try, and not expect to win. That might be the game plan.

I'll try to write a little every day before November, just to see if I can make it work. I might not be able to - October will probably be my busiest month.

We'll see what happens. I'm worried, though. I'll post more later on my deliberations.